The Grinch (a.k.a. Lincoln and Jason depending on the time of day). Time 1: Lincoln in a blissful slumber. It was the coldest day here in Oregon but the sun was shining -- go figure. Lincoln was wearing his ski sweater, fleece jacket, and bundle me. He slept through the entire hunt. Jason was less than thrilled to go find a tree or to decorate. You see all I can think about is what a pain in the butt it will be to get the tree, set it up, and tear it down in Jan. when it is dead and sheds all over the house. Sadly Holli lives in la la land where everything is gay, merry, and bright.
Time 2: They charge for trees by the foot and we could only
afford a 6-7 foot
doug fur. Of course there are no more of these trees left on the lot. After 10 minutes of looking Holli went to the warming shack and left Jason (now you see why I love doing this) to find this
elusive fur! I gave up a couple minutes later but we chopped this tree down, 2 ft off the ground (illegal move), for my friend Mike - shown here (wife also in shed). I opted for a
pre-cut tree in the affordable range.
Time 3: Workers can cut, shake, and bale your tree. They load it on the car via drive through service. This day is looking better, at the moment, for Jason . For Lincoln on the other hand, he is slowly waking up, and now wants all this cold weather crap off HIS FACE!!!
Shaker slash baler - pretty sweat operation
Time 4: Luckily the adventure includes a holiday
bazaar full of fun. They sell antiques from the early 1990's and other assorted
gems like used ash trays. Wreaths and center pieces with fake snow also available.
Time 5: Lincoln with Santa. Santa either joined Jenny Craig or the
elfs are
peddling crack, either way he needed more cookies and milk in his diet. Take a tip from Lincoln -- "milk is great LOOK AT MY CHUBBY FACE!!!"
Time 6: "Thanks dad but I am not sure who the bigger ASS is you or Andrew." We are slowly working our way to really pissing Lincoln off with cutesy pictures --- just wait for what comes next!
Time 7: (Jason and Lincoln both angry) Holli removes baby Jesus from the manger scene and replaces him with Lincoln. While she debates whether or not this is
sacrilegious Jason moves to the other end of the
bazaar trying desperately to locate a new less
embarrassing family. Shortly after Lincoln gets out of the manger 2 four year
olds crawl in following Holli's lead; they were yelled at by there more responsible mother.
Merry Christmas from Jason and Lincoln!!! "MOM IS THIS HOW YOU HOPED THIS DAY WOULD TURN OUT!?!?!"
The Grinch (a.k.a. Lincoln and Jason depending on the time of day). Time 1: Lincoln in a blissful slumber. It was the coldest day here in Oregon but the sun was shining -- go figure. Lincoln was wearing his ski sweater, fleece jacket, and bundle me. He slept through the entire hunt. Jason was less than thrilled to go find a tree or to decorate. You see all I can think about is what a pain in the butt it will be to get the tree, set it up, and tear it down in Jan. when it is dead and sheds all over the house. Sadly Holli lives in la la land where everything is gay, merry, and bright.
Time 2: They charge for trees by the foot and we could only afford a 6-7 foot doug fur. Of course there are no more of these trees left on the lot. After 10 minutes of looking Holli went to the warming shack and left Jason (now you see why I love doing this) to find this elusive fur! I gave up a couple minutes later but we chopped this tree down, 2 ft off the ground (illegal move), for my friend Mike - shown here (wife also in shed). I opted for a pre-cut tree in the affordable range.
Time 3: Workers can cut, shake, and bale your tree. They load it on the car via drive through service. This day is looking better, at the moment, for Jason . For Lincoln on the other hand, he is slowly waking up, and now wants all this cold weather crap off HIS FACE!!!
Shaker slash baler - pretty sweat operation
Time 4: Luckily the adventure includes a holiday bazaar full of fun. They sell antiques from the early 1990's and other assorted gems like used ash trays. Wreaths and center pieces with fake snow also available.
Time 5: Lincoln with Santa. Santa either joined Jenny Craig or the elfs are peddling crack, either way he needed more cookies and milk in his diet. Take a tip from Lincoln -- "milk is great LOOK AT MY CHUBBY FACE!!!"
Time 6: "Thanks dad but I am not sure who the bigger ASS is you or Andrew." We are slowly working our way to really pissing Lincoln off with cutesy pictures --- just wait for what comes next!
Time 7: (Jason and Lincoln both angry) Holli removes baby Jesus from the manger scene and replaces him with Lincoln. While she debates whether or not this is sacrilegious Jason moves to the other end of the bazaar trying desperately to locate a new less embarrassing family. Shortly after Lincoln gets out of the manger 2 four year olds crawl in following Holli's lead; they were yelled at by there more responsible mother.
Merry Christmas from Jason and Lincoln!!! "MOM IS THIS HOW YOU HOPED THIS DAY WOULD TURN OUT!?!?!"
this is HILARIOUS! lincoln looks like a 3 yr old on santa's lap. no offense linc. you look small again in the manger. of course, you did sort of kick baby jesus out of his bed.
ReplyDeleteThat was the funniest blog I hae ever read! Crying a little!
ReplyDeleteI love it! I about peed my pants once I saw Lincoln in the manager...oh...The Mitchell's...rather strange but ridiculously funny!
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha....love the pic of Lincoln in the Manager. Not quite sure what Christmas rule you've broken, but I'm sure God has a sense of humor. :)
ReplyDeleteOh man - 3.5 hours is still too far away!! These stories are why I love you guys so much!
ReplyDelete(Holli - You left the manger portion out on the phone last week...)